Sydney Festival of Really Good Sex 25-29 January 2017

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Release your inhibitions and ask your questions! You will have fun learning! This express, straight-to-the-point course for the busy woman who just needs to cut through the chase. (Are men also wecome?)

I’ve conducted more than 80 hand-job workshops, and 50 blow-job workshops for ladies. Best of Eros is my most popular workshop where the best of my hand and blow job techniques are taught.

You will learn:

  • Why men love receiving a blow job
  • Why he likes you to cum in your mouth
  • What to do when you have pain while giving head
  • Best hand and blow job techniques (More than 20!)
  • How to perfect those skills through practising on a carrot, or on your partner!

This is clothing-optional workshop. If you attend with your partner, you can begin practising on the spot

What Past Participants Said:

“In this workshop, you delivered so much more than just a lesson on ‘how to please your man’. Your great sense of humour puts participants at ease. All the tricks and flourishes were based on an empowering message of open communication, mutual respect & enjoyment in our relationships. It enables us to lead the way toward deeper connection. When I put my learning into practice, the experience was very intense and amazing for my partner as well as myself. This has definitely opened the door to further exploration and deeper levels of intimacy. I’m curious to learn more and will look out for your other workshops!” –  L, Aug 2013

“I want to thank you for giving this workshop blow his mind on 31st Aug! My Husband comment that I’m very different and said I’ve broke my own record today! He is very happy and did everything for me without having me to ask for it! I would like to attend more of your workshops again soon.” – Anonymous, Aug 2013

“No one learns these pleasuring techniques from a professional as we become sexually active. We end up experimenting (mostly incorrectly) and sabotaging our intimate experience. It is great to learn all these techniques. Now time to experiment.” – Anonymous, Aug 2013

Paths Cannot Be Taught, They Can Only Be Taken

About three years ago a significant change occurred in my life. After having come to the school regularly for about three years, I decided to move to New York on receiving a scholarship to do a Ph.D at an American university. Among all the other things that were changing for me at that time, there was the anxiety about whether I could maintain the same level of practice without the school every week, and without my teachers’ intimate knowledge of my body and history. Will I in the future go forward or back? And how much have I learnt really? What do I agree with, and what not? What is useful and what isn’t? How much do I really need yoga? What is the relation of yoga to other priorities of my life? 

I believe everyone who comes to the school for some time has these anxieties and questions. They are perhaps buried in the regularity and routine of coming to class and paying for the next month. Leaving Australia confronted me with them in an acute fashion. Looking back, I don’t believe I was simply passive in that experience; it was a kind of “test” that I gave to myself. 

I will try to resist the temptation of resuming in a coherent narrative what the results of this test have been, given that – as we all know - the “process” is necessarily open-ended; and that what seems true today may be untrue tomorrow, and that; moreover, all by myself I am not able to evaluate what has happened to me. So, provisionally, I will put down in point form what I feel might be most helpful to share:


1. Today I find that I practice more than I did then, and in a somewhat different way, or with different intentions. In the past, even though I was certainly aware of my back “issues”, I was very concerned with getting stronger and more flexible, and was also a little bit competitive (“in a non-competitive way”). (I don’t believe anyone is totally immune to this.) Today I am almost exclusively concerned with recognizing and working with the “issues” and “patterns” that I have. Maybe I am not as flexible or as strong as I was before, but my commitment and understanding of yoga is, I believe, much deeper. I may become more flexible and stronger again, but for the moment sustainability in my personal practice is the most important thing to me, and what I’ve most struggled with. Whatever you learn, it has to be consolidated the next day – thus logically nothing is ever learnt in the sense of being definitively grasped or possessed. It’s not that one doesn’t learn, but that the learning is always to be reconfirmed – or if you like – begun again. Existentially, one is always grappling with the spectres of loss.


2. As it turned out, it wasn’t simply possible to replace the school here, with another school over there. (Some things thankfully are irreplaceable.) In other Iyengar schools in other parts of the world, the emphasis is different; the poses are even practiced differently. At the beginning, this was very confusing and disturbing for me. Because my body without regular practice quickly becomes very stiff, I was even taken at times for being an absolute beginner, someone who had never done an Iyengar class before… Eventually, I found some teachers with whom I feel comfortable to work, and have learnt that different kinds of relationships with yoga teachers are possible. Fortunately, I am able to come back at least twice a year and do classes at the school. So thankfully, it’s not a question of choosing. I do fewer classes now than I did before, but I still do them. (I also “use” the classes differently. My participation is not as automatic as it used to be.) And I have a better understanding of the role that yoga plays in my life. I recently bought Iyengar’s Yoga: The Path to Holistic Health and often work with sequences that correspond to the specific problems that I have. (But, on the other hand, I’ve also developed new problems, that may not have developed if I had stayed in the school, and not submitted myself to the stresses of moving to a new country (or rather, new countries) with different cultures and totally different climates.)


3. I like to practice when I wake-up; if for some reason I can’t, I try to do it in the early evening; and if not then, before I go to sleep. It is somewhat flexible. And sometimes I don’t manage to practice at all. And then you have to practice forgiveness, because the guilt element is very strong. So you really don’t escape. But I think everyone knows that already – or knows it without knowing it. There’s a practice of coping with guilt - and perhaps a practice without guilt. I would say that on average at the moment I practice about 3-4 times a week, and go to class once a week. I practice usually for more than an hour, between one and a half and two hours.


4. There have been times when I have stopped practicing, thinking that yoga was not the most helpful thing for the specific problems that I have. But I came back to it, recognizing the wisdom of the integrative whole body approach. As a technique, yoga, unlike physiotherapy, doesn’t isolate; it works with the whole body and, above all, with the connections (for example, between the hands and the upper back, or the feet and the lower back). I don’t practice yoga in isolation, movement is also very important to me – and indeed so is reading and writing.*


5. I have practiced with a friend. We make a time and we practice together, which has at times been very inspiring and empowering: to look at one another’s poses, and ask questions, experiment and do partner work; or otherwise, simply practice independently in the same room. There I found myself doing things I would rarely do alone, like back bends. I would suggest this to people. It’s very helpful, and encourages a kind of communication about oneself and one’s yoga that is more intimate and deeper and more honest. And then, moreover, it’s not only the teachers that you exchange with – wonderful as he and/or she may be.


6. For me, the hardest thing is usually to begin. If I begin, I will usually carry through to the end, and it will build up. Occasionally, I bale out after a few poses – if for some reason, it’s really not working. I never make myself do it. I let go, in order to do it. (Interestingly, this is the same with my writing practice.) This in fact is counter-intuitive. It is not that you have to do something; or that there is something you have to do. It’s that you have to stop doing something, or “let go” of it, in order to do it, because the desire is already there. A way must be cleared or opened for it.


7. One thing I often struggle with is the desire to have coffee and eat something when I wake up in the morning, because I’m tired and often feel vulnerable. (This is even more so the case, if I’ve got a cold.) But if I give in to that temptation, I often won’t practice. It’s a bit like giving up smoking, if you’ve ever had that experience (one of the most important of my life): the key is to know your triggers, and not to act on them.


8. Finally, little things can make a huge difference – little things are huge – minute decisions that have enormous psychological consequences: like buying four blankets for shoulder stand; one day moving the furniture around in one’s room so that one can make use of a long wall or a ledge for standing poses; deciding to time oneself in head stand; wrapping a belt around a door handle to activate one’s upper thighs in a dog pose. Each of these things is a leap in terms of autonomy and self-responsibility. Including headstand and shoulder-stand in my practice virtually every time was also a very important step. It changed everything. The great virtue of practicing at home is that it gives you the space and time to gain your own insights, and/or to make the insights you’ve already had in class into your own. This is what some education theorists call “deep learning”.


9. Yoga breeds great compassion.


Peter Banki, September 10, 2005 

(Published in the Sydney Yoga Space Newsletter, Dec. 2005)


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